I unbuckled from my seat and crawled to the back of the van to free the kids from their car seats and seatbelts. They were unhurt, and I felt such relief! But relief soon turned to worry; how were we going to get out of this mess (read: how are we going to pay for this?), and WHERE THE HECK WERE THE PEOPLE WHO CAN HELP US?
Then gunshots, so many gunshots. I lost count of how many as I scrambled to keep my kids flat on the floor of the van (which was actually the roof) to avoid being hit by a bullet. The entire van was filled with the very palpable presence of fear and anxiety.
Fortunately, because it was a dream, the people shooting at us had terrible aim and no one was hit.
But here's my private theory: October arrived again, as it always does, and sucked the air out of the room. October means pain.
And now, apparently, October is gunning for me and a few more of my kids.